You Are 53% Passionate, 47% Compassionate

You possess an ideal balance of passion and compassion. You definitely can get swept away and lose your head a little. But you're rarely a fool for love!

Is Your Love Style Passionate or Compassionate?

Somedays I think I'd like to be a fool but then that darned rationality sneaks back in.

I wonder if he got any takers.

Man fixes PCs in exchange for second base From Craigslist SF Bay Area: I'll Fix Your Computer if You Let Me Feel Your Boobs - 26 (haight ashbury)



Cute/nice IT guy/PC specialist will fix your computer in exchange for a gentle feel of your boobs. I'm a totally non-creepy (really) professional who will repair your hard drive, back up files, install software and peripherals, whatever, for an innocent grope. I have a lot of tech knowledge in my life and regrettably no boobs. Serious inquiries only and thanks.

Extreme Makeover: Home Edition
Mom and Dad (he's blind)
2 daughters (they are almost blind)
1 son (he's deaf)
Gramma (blind as well)

A 2 hr episode. Many tears ensued.
Everytime. Every single time I blub like a big baby.
I love and hate the show :)

Disobey my own decisions, I deserve all your suspicion
First it's yes and then it's no, I dilly dally down to duo
But I got no secrets that I babble in my sleep,
I won't make promises to you that I can't keep

And you know that I love you here and now, not forever
I can give you the present, I don't know 'bout the future,
that's all stuff and nonsense

I once lived for the future, every day was one day closer
Greener on the other side, this I believed before I met you
I soon learned your love burned brighter than the stars in my eyes
Now I know how and when I know where and why

And you know that I love you here and now, not forever
I can give you the present, I don't know 'bout the future,
that's all stuff and nonsense

I hadn't heard from the new guy(maybe I should name him) for over 2 weeks. I got an email this evening.

It felt like a weight lifted....
And that makes me happy and sad.

I Don't Know.

That's my head right now. I don't know. And do I ever hate that. And it make me ramble.

I guess I am feeling out of 'it'. I am someone who has a lot of friends, good friends not just acquaintance types, yet right now I feel lonely and alone too much of the time. I am certain part of it is how different my life is from all of their's (married and either pregnant or all ready with kids). I would say 99% of this feeling is me induced. They always ask me to be involved in goings on and I am the favourite among the kids (I am 'the bestest adult friend' and 'I so funny').

I think it is a combo of age (birthday is soonish), wanting a new job, wanting to change where I live and wanting someone to share life with.

I swear I do not have a fairytale ideal in my head when it comes to someone to be with. I've seen the work involved and I've also seen it all fall apart. Along with that I get to see how much fun, connection and, dare I say, love can be involved (ooh, the L word). I don't need this but I sure do want it.

It seems to be a bad case of the blues combined with jealousy and fear with a dash of what the hell on the side. Could I be depressed? Maybe. I am like a leaky faucet right now when I am alone and yet I choose to be alone as I don't want to fall apart around other people. Ugh. They worry or give advice and/or platitudes and this makes me feel guity and grumpy as I really do have it pretty good overall.

I think I am looking at where I am , where I thought I would be and trying to figure out where I want to go. This is ongoing. I've taken workshops, classes, read books and asked questions but I keep coming up blank.

Sigh.
Rambles.